Cruel's Yaoi Meme
by sweet-and-simple
Summary: I.  Hey there!  Who the hell are you and what was your first yaoi favorite?  Behold the meme with GaaLee, KakaIru, 1880, some unimportant side pairings, poetry, AU's, perversion, and a hint of humor!


_I. Hey there! Who the hell are you and what was your first yaoi favorite?_

Author's Note: Hello, I'm sweet-and-simple! I write lots of M-rated stories and enjoy depicting sadistic, yaoi relationships~ (i.e. 1827, 6927, RL, 8059, 1880, 5927 [if you think about it, it _is_ sadistic], so on, so forth).

Ah, my first yaoi favorite? GaaLee from Naruto (Lee reminds me of Ryohei, heh heh):

Lee pumped his fists into the air, a large, sparkling grin on his lips. "YOSH! Do you hear that, Gaara-kun?" He threw himself at the redhead, unbothered by the agitated bristle of sand as his lips press to the coarse cheek of his lover. "We are an accepted couple!"

The Kazekage slanted a gaze at the eccentric green beast of Konoha, no emotion apparent. Instead, he nodded, wordlessly agreeing with the other teen.

"The power of love and youth has made us strong!"

_II. Interesting… What's your current fandom? _(Author's Note: Because I've already done two on RL, I've decided to go with another favorite for this meme)

"Hah hah hah!" Yamamoto thoughtlessly throws an arm over Hibari's shoulders. "We should go to the beach, Kyoya! The weather's supposed to be really nice today."

Hibari glares wordlessly at the baseball player. "Get your arm off of me or I will bite you to death."

Yamamoto, instead, nuzzles his head into the curve of Hibari's shoulder and neck. "If we get there early enough~" He breathes into the prefect's ear. "We'll beat traffic… and if we beat traffic~ we can do _bad_ stuff in the water." He grins airily. "But~ that's only if you wanna go, Kyoya."

They make it to the beach in three minutes flat.

_III. Now to test your loyalty to that pairing. Write about both of your bishounen with a woman without vomiting!_

Haru clings to Yamamoto's arm, flashing him a large smile. "Let's go get cake with Kyoko, Yamamoto!"

Yamamoto smiles down at her. "Sure!" Out of the corner of his eye, he sees a shorter male with raven-wing black hair, pale skin, and slate blue eyes walking in the opposite direction.

On the other man's arm is a teenage Chinese girl with braided pigtails sweeping down her back, her large dark eyes looking up at her partner.

For one reason or another, Yamamoto's heart clenches painfully, as if he is supposed to know the other man – but this is the first time he had ever seen the other teenager…

As if sensing his stare, the other male stops and looks back at him. Friendly brown orbs meet cold, slanted blue eyes with an almost painful jerk. There is a moment where all they do is stare, as if they're trying to recollect the same thing.

The Chinese girl asks something of the man and he nods, turning around without a second glance and walking right out of Yamamoto's life.

For one reason or another, he feels strangely hollow…

_IV. Now with another MAN!_

"You baseball-freak! Let me go, I have to get back to Tenth's side!" Gokudera struggles fruitlessly in Yamamoto's arms as the swordsman carries him away from the school. "Baseball-freak – !" Gokudera falls uncertainly silent, eyebrows drawn together.

Yamamoto's expression is confused, lips subtly grimacing. He catches Gokudera's staring and the expression is washed away with a cheesy grin. "What is it, Hayato?"

Gokudera can not even half-heartedly tell his boyfriend to not call him so familiarly. "What's wrong with you?" He growls.

Yamamoto shrugs carelessly; of course he won't tell Gokudera that the sight of Tsuna's boyfriend, the skylark prefect, had twisted his heart into a confused little bundle of feelings.

_V. Lose your bento yet? No? Good! Now show me what you like best about your pairing. _(Author's Note: Where to start… Well, Yamamoto's straightforwardness is really nice when pitted against Hibari's violence~ and I really like how they're both really strong characters and yet they have two completely different personalities… most of all, I just love making them a perverted couple.)

"Ky~oy~a…" Yamamoto enters the prefect's lounge with an air of obliviousness to danger and a large, cheesy grin on his face. "Yo!"

Hibari, at his desk signing documents, stops short. Slowly, he sets his pen down and stands up, hands going to his tonfas. "Takeshi Yamamoto…" He begins in a low, cold voice. "What have I told you about doing this sort of thing?"

Yamamoto cocks his head curiously. "Which sort of thing? Calling you Kyoya or coming into your office uninvited?"

"_Both_."

"… Hhhmm… Can't remember!" He forgoes the tonfas and presses into Hibari's personal space; the steel rods are precariously close to his skull as he clings to the hem of the prefect's shirt and nibbles at the color of his jacket. "Sooo~" He grins at the skylark, the disciplinary figure having paused in his plans to beat the sports player to a bloody pulp. "I should tell you that I'm really horny right now! Hah hah!"

_VI. So cute. Now how about the things you hate most about them?_

"Yamamoto, Takeshi…" Hibari growls in a low, sadistic voice. He pulls out his tonfas and hold them before him, body moving into an offense stance. "I will _bite_ you to death."

Yamamoto gulps, eyeballing the steel rods. "Hah hah hah…" He laughs a little nervously, putting his hands defensively up in front of him. "You mean _literally_, right?" He sounds hopeful.

Hibari is startled enough that he stares at Yamamoto with narrowed eyes, jaw clenched. "_No_."

"Aaah… damn it."

_VII. What's the strangest thing you have ever seen your couple do?_

Yamamoto is flushed darkly, his eyes glued on a blushing, annoyed Hibari… wrapped in pink ribbons… and sitting on his lap. "Hah hah hah…" Even his laughter sounds a little nervous. "So, uuhh… This is a part of you I've never seen before, uumm…"

Hibari glares at him. "Shut up."

_VIII. Write about your favorite, fruity guys in a style you rarely use! _(Author's Note: I had to change this question completely for it to make sense…)

Yamamoto's katana sliced the air

He smiled with cocky flare.

"If you wanna play, Kyoya" he said

"We should take this to bed, instead!".

Hibari glared at him

His patience was worn thin.

"I'll bite you to death!" He swore

He readied his tonfas for blood and gore.

"Hah hah~" Takeshi looked pleased.

"Please be gentle~" He teased.

They proceeded to fight

Morning overcame night.

Their war went from the field to the floor

Where Yamamoto gasped for more.

Then Tsuna went to the field to train

And what he saw numbed his brain.

He hoped they were just playing a strange game

But he still never looked at them the same.

_IX. Now write about them in their original style._

"Mah mah, Kyoya-kun~" Yamamoto grinned obliviously at the pointedly glaring prefect. "You look a little angry!"

Hibari, without taking his eyes off of the _yakyu-baka_, pulls out a thick manila folder and flips it open to the last page. Still with his eyes on the other male, he states: "You owe 168,053 _yen_ for the damages to the school."

Yamamoto laughed nervously. "Is that so?" He rubbed the back of his head. "I don't remember destroying school property lately…"

Hibari reached behind him and did up the blinds on the large windows. Revealed was complete and utter destruction of the courtyard.

"… _Oh_! I remember now! Hah hah hah!... Uumm… So… do you know where I could make that much money?" Yamamoto fidgeted at Hibari's suddenly carnivorous grin – the same one he dons whenever he's planning on biting a strong opponent to death. "Mah mah, Kyoya-kun; _you_ wouldn't be thinking of employing me for… something like _that_, would you?"

"If you want to make 168,053 _yen_ by the end of next week in time to pay for the repairs, you should be hoping that I _would_ employ you for something like that."

"Next week?"

"Is there a problem with that?"

There was a momentary silence.

"Sooo… This thing you're hiring me for…?"

"Get your katana."

Yamamoto felt himself relax. "Gotcha! So I'll pay for the damages by sparring with you – "

"And then strip."

_X. I've already put you through hell, so why not some more? Write about my favorite pairing for me, please! (FYI, it's KakaIru)._

Iruka glares suspiciously at the white-haired ninja at his side. He's aware of how the world is slowly spinning around him, gradually gaining speed. He puts a hand to his forehead, trying to shake away the dizziness (bad idea). "You wouldn't have happened to put… anything in my food… _Would you_?" He slurs.

Kakashi points at himself, the act of innocence destroyed by his happily slanted eyes and hidden expression. "Who, me?" Iruka's face slams against the table, effectively knocked out. "Well, maybe…"

_XI. Before the torture ends, how do you think you would react if you saw your Yaoi couple in real life?_

"PLEASE LEMME SEE YOU TWO MAKE OUT WHILE I TAKE PICTURES WITH THIS CELLPHONE I STOLE FROM SOME RANDOM DUDE OFF THE STREET!"

"I will _bite_ you to death."

"Hah hah! That's the third girl this week…"

"I'M BEING BITTEN TO DEATH BY HIBARIIIIIII!"

_XII. Feasting time! __Eat__ some people… _(Author's Note: Double meaning~)

Hibari's hand is tangled in Yamamoto's hair, keeping the teen in place as he thrusts in and out of his hot mouth. Yamamoto's eyes are laughing wickedly up at him, even as they tear somewhat from having his gag reflex abused.

When Hibari cums in his mouth, Yamamoto swallows every drop, hands clutching Hibari's hips as he does so. Hibari lets him go only afterwards and Yamamoto releases the prefect's softening member with an exaggerated 'pop'. He runs his tongue along the deflated length, pleasure a haze over his expression.

Hibari raises an eyebrow; Yamamoto grins cockily up at him. "Hah hah~" His voice is hoarse from his earlier activities. "I really _love_… meat!"

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Tee hee~ This one was a little more of a challenge! However, that made it no less fun. Ah, but I felt my poetry skills were a little rusty… And maybe that I made Yamamoto out to be a sexual deviant… Hhmmm…<p>

I have a challenge for other writers out there! PLEASE WRITE FANFIC-MEMES LIKE THESE! 'Cause I _really_ want to read them!


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